I was asked the other day if I thought God brings people together or if marriages happen more as a result of our choices? I’m no expert on marriage but I believe if we allow Him, God leads and guides us in all areas of our lives, including marriage. The Bible assures us in many scriptures that God is personally involved in, and concerned with our lives. So yes, I believe that God does connect people. However, because He gives us the gift of choice, God is not going to force us to accept the man or woman He has chosen for us. Just as He does not force us to accept the gift of Salvation, we have to choose to receive it. I think the key to mold God’s sovereignty and our free choice is to make our choices only in obedience to Him.
The Bible says that when you marry, you become one flesh. Marriage will alter the course of the rest of your life. Which is why we should seek God’s guidance and pray for discernment and wisdom before marriage. And we should pay attention when He speaks. If you are used to hearing God when He speaks to your heart, He may just tell you if it’s the right person when you meet him or her, but after the voice there will be confirmations through His word concerning what He told you. Don’t ignore the signs or your gut feelings. Sometimes we ignore what God is telling us because it’s not what we want to hear. We may choose a spouse based on our worldly external desires, such as appearance, status, attraction, or education. I am not saying there is anything wrong with those things, but as my Pastor likes to say, that should be the icing on the cake. The actual cake is God’s purpose for marriage. Marriage is to bring glory to God and point outsiders, who are looking in, to a loving and redeeming God. Marriage is to be used to expand the Kingdom of God through the gospel. God chooses for us the man or woman that is relevant to our glorious destiny in life!
It may not be as simple as asking God and immediately He sends you your kingdom mate, although it has been known to happen. God wants to make sure we are ready for what we are asking for. He may need to do some work within us or He may be working on the person He is going to place in our life. This process requires patience and trusting that God knows what and who is best for us. We get impatient waiting on God when it seems everybody else is in a relationship or getting married. But we must trust God and not make impulsive decisions. Don’t get nervous thinking time is running out. There are many examples in the Bible that proves God does not do time or age. What He has for us is good for us and it’s always on time. Wait on God!
Some people are not meant to be carried into the next phase of our journey. God repositions, rearranges & brings us to maturity regarding our relationships, so that we are prepared for the next level. Not everyone is purposed to occupy a permanent position like a spouse in our lives nor to be a shareholder in our future blessings from God. God uses some people to prepare us for the greatness that is to come. We have to know when to let go and move forward. Because again what we think we want may not be what’s best for us. God is concerned about our families, children, jobs, health, and every aspect of our lives. He loves us and wants what is best for us, that includes spouses!
For marriage or anything else to work in our life, our primary focus should be on Jesus. If you are searching for a spouse without first developing a personal relationship with Jesus, you are putting the cart before the horse. If God promised you a husband or wife, be patient and rest not in what you see, but in what He has already promised you! Love and Blessings…
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” (Jeremy 29:11)
“Everything is permissible but not everything is beneficial.”
(1 Corinthians 10:23)
“You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh, rather, serve one another, humbly in love.” (Galatians 5:13)
“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12)
“For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh.” (Genesis 2:24)
“For the Kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking but of righteousness and peace and joy in the holy Spirit.” (Romans 14:17)
“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” (Matthew 6:33)
“Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD.” (Psalm 27:14)